Blood Sacrifice

Finally doing that B post that I was missing!

Trigger warning for discussion of cutting. Warning for discussion of blood and blood sacrifice.

On June 23rd, at sunset, I had a Landbinding shift. This is one of the once-every-20-days shift that I’ve come up with to complement my Flamekeeping shifts with Brighid — Landbinding is for Morrigan, Seaseeking is for Manannan.

I decided to try doing something that I’d being thinking of doing for Her for a while — sacrificing some blood.

I used a very sharp blade to cut myself at two points — forehead and chin, because they hurt the least and head wounds produce more blood than elsewhere — and proceeded to get as much blood as possible into a vial. My cuts didn’t bleed as much as I  wanted to, and the blood coagulated quickly. Next time I’ll be putting some sort of anti-coagulant into the vial before collecting the blood, if I can find any.

Regardless, I took what little I had collected and — after bandaging my face — went to my altar, where I proceeded to light a candle and sacrifice the blood to the flame. I may have said a prayer; I can’t remember, exactly.

It was appreciated.

Part of blood sacrifice is re-asserting control over my body. I can’t control a lot of things about my body, but controlling when I give blood to the gods and how much is something I can do. As well, I’m a recovering cutter — so blood sacrifice in this fashion is a test of my will, my discipline. While it felt good to release, it only did when I was giving the blood to Morrigan. I tried cutting again a few days after the sacrifice and it no longer gave me any release. It gave me nothing.

So there’s an example of how religion can make you stronger.

Anyway.

I need to know when to cut, and where to cut, and when to stop cutting. Figuratively and literally. So when I sacrifice my blood — when I set it aside as sacred — I’m also learning when and where to cut. The face, because head wounds bleed more and it’s an easier collection spot — I’m also less likely to cut too deep and hit a vein. On my shifts for Morrigan, because giving Her blood is binding myself to the land — the blooded earth and I become one. Other times of sacrifice.

Not outside of religion, and not places that are too dangerous to my health. Danger can be healthy, in certain cases, but having to call 911 and then being branded an attempted suicide and possibly given medication that may fuck with my mental health even more — this doesn’t help me in my quest for bodily autonomy.

Blood sacrifice is helping me learn control over myself, and I think that’s the bigger picture Morrigan is pushing, here.

Disclaimer: I’m not endorsing willy-nilly blood sacrifice with this post. It took a lot of consideration and time before I decided to do this; it was not a lightly-made decision. Do your research, think hard about it, always make sure your tools are sterile, and cut in a place that’s safe.