Wellness 4 Wolffy

An image saying "Wellness 4 Wolffy" in blue text. Two wolves stand howling on either side of the text, and the number 4 rests over a paw print.

This is the most important update I have right now. Basically, the long and short of it is my mom is sick, we don’t know what it is except it’s likely cancer again, and we need help, so I’ve set up a fundraiser to that end.

If you want to read my initial blog post about this, and the terror and helplessness I’ve been feeling, you can see it at my writing blog. I’m pretty sure I’ve talked here before about how much my mom means to me, so it’s probably a no brainer that this news basically completely wrecked me.

If you don’t know anything about my mom, let me tell you how amazing she is. She used to live in Yukon with her wolf-dog Amaruq, and she survived a winter night in the woods with no supplies save the dog-walking clothes she’d put on and a warm wolf-dog to curl up next to. When an asshole southerner came up and started harassing her (including attempted sexual assault, not just against her but against many other women in Dawson) and letting his dog harass Amaruq, Mom used her words until the guy crossed the line, and then she beat the shit out of him in the center of town while denizens of Dawson City cheered her on.

She’s had a million different careers, including educator and lawyer. She was the Bride of the Devil and survived the Marriage (and Divorce) from Hell. She raised me singlehandedly in the wilds of Vancouver and then Maui, resorting to the food bank and begging on the street to feed me when we were out of options. Despite the injury that broke her leg and destroyed her back, making her too sick to work or do much else, she fought like hell to keep my safe from my abusive bio-sire, and continued to work her ass off to keep us afloat once we finally won custody from the bastard.

My momma's smiling face, 4 different times.
My momma’s smiling face, 4 different times.

She continued to support me after I moved out and went to college, financially, emotionally, and artistically. If it weren’t for her I wouldn’t have published Bellica in 2011 nor come out with 2 more books since. She has always had my back when it comes to my passions, my art, and my career dreams — even if there’s no promise of any financial return from my chosen career of being an artist.

She raised me Buddhist, singing the 21 Praises of Tara, and when I announced I was converting to Wicca she was thrilled. She helped me bake cakes and bought “ale” (Martinelli’s) for my first big ritual, and drove me to the beach at dawn so I could perform it. Throughout my religious life she’s continued to support my journey, even if her approach to Buddhism is decidedly non-religious, and she has been non-religious since she left her childhood religion of Protestantism.

She’s the person I can call up and talk to about my spells, my attempts at witchcraft, the weird shit that happens to me when I worship the gods. She’s the person I first told about my plan to open a witchcraft shop, and she was 100% supportive. When I talk about maybe writing a book on witchcraft someday, she urges me to do it, saying the world needs my voice.

Not only has she supported my artistic and creative endeavours my entire life, she had the courage to pick up her own artistic passions again after escaping my bio-sire. After years in a marriage where she would throw away her writing, lest he find it and read it, she was finally able to pick up her pen again and has written 9 books to date — fiction, non-fiction, and poetry.

Bottom line, my mom is an incredible human being, and I want her to be around for at least another 20 years. (She’s only 66, ffs.) If you agree with me that she’s amazing and want to help out, there are a few different ways.

Number 1 is the fundraiser I mentioned above. Mom’s too sick to work right now; she needs help to pay for treatments. Her puny pension barely takes care of basic living expenses.

Number 2 — spread the word. You can use the hashtag #Wellness4Wolffy on Twitter or any other social media network. Send the fundraiser link to all your friends. Let people know why you think it’s a worthy cause.

Number 3 — buy our books! Any ebook purchased from Kat & Wolff will help with Mom’s fundraiser (books purchased via 3rd-party retailers like Amazon don’t help). If you have our books already, tell your friends about them! Know any wolf-lovers? Suggest How to Keep a Human or Stranger Skies to them. (Witch-lovers will also like Stranger Skies.) Fans of epic fantasy? Bellica and The Jade Star of Athering. Literary fiction readers who want to read about escape from abusive relationships? White Birds, Broken Sleep, and La Chiripa. People who like absinthe? Bitters. Poetry-lovers? the witless poisoner and glasstown. Or my mom’s non-fiction — one on dental tourism and one on how she fixed her thyroid.

Again, only books bought through our direct sales sites (Kat and Wolff, Kaimana Wolff.com, Katje van Loon.com, The Pack Press, and Stars Above, Stars Below) will help us with the fundraiser, because we get the money immediately and with minimal fees. The money from Amazon and other 3rd-party retailers comes much later, and with more fees taken out. (This isn’t to say don’t ever buy our books from Amazon; gods know it’s also a big help. Just a different sort of help from the fundraiser we’re specifically running right now.)

Number 4 — read my mom’s blog. She’s chronicling her illness at The Law of Love, the blog for her non-fiction persona. Feedback is also very much appreciated! First post is “The Boiling Frog,” with posts coming up every Wednesday for the next few weeks.

Number 5 — if you are local (ie, Southwest BC), there will be a chance to donate and get physical perks. I’m still setting things up, but stay tuned to this page to see what we have available. This way of helping is only available to local folks because of shipping time/money costs.

Ok, that was pretty long-winded. A few other short updates:

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Book Review: Mrs. B’s Guide to Household Witchery

This may or may not become a regular feature here as I work my way through actually reading the books I’ve accumulated on the Craft/paganism/religion/theology/myth/etc.

Mrs. B’s Guide to Household Witchery: Everyday Magic, Spells, and Recipes by Kris Bradley (creator of Confessions of a Pagan Soccer Mom).

A book cover with a floral print background and a silhouette of a black cat.  Title reads
Book cover.

I think I picked this book up shortly after it was first published, in 2012. It’s been sitting around on my TBR list since, and I finally decided to actually, you know, read it.

The specific reason I picked up this book to read was because I was looking to re-inspire myself in witchcraft. I have been feeling so…decidedly unwitchy of late and I was tired of it. Watching a million episodes of Charmed and spending too much time in witch-tumblr has made me want to get back in the game, so I read Bradley’s book.

First things first: it served its purpose. Reading this book made me feel like witchcraft was accessible again. That is a huge pro to Bradley’s writing, actually — she makes it clear that yes, you can do this stuff even if life is drowning you, and she gives specific ideas on how to make your mundane life more magical. So, right up my alley.

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Motivation (or, How I Need to Trick Myself to Get Shit Done)

I’m trying to find ways to motivate myself right now. It’s not easy.

I’ve been stuck in a depressive funk for a while and I’m not sure why. Even on days when my mood is stable/okay, I’m still unmotivated to do anything. I keep thinking I should really reorganize and clean the pantry, I should clean the kitchen, I should do my physio exercises, I should go outside and breathe air….

Do any of these things happen? No. I rarely do my physio, I go outside only for absolute necessities (like grocery shopping), and the rest? My idea of cleaning the other day was to move stuff from the guest bed to the floor.

The worst part of all this is I’m unmotivated to Do Religion, too. I’m trying to find bare minimum physical acts of worship that I can do, even if I’m not feeling it. Beyond lighting candles to Hestia daily and offering Her coffee, I’ve been stuck.

I’m writing this post because today I found a way to motivate myself to do a mundane thing and a religious thing by combining them. (NOVEL IDEA, ZIE WHO CALLS ZIRSELF THE MUNDANE MYSTIC.) And I may be able to extrapolate this to other things. But for now, my idea is to motivate myself to do physio by tying it to religion. 

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Putting the ‘mundane’ back in ‘mystic’

I’ve been thinking for a little bit about something said elseweb, about how we get this idea that religion has to be big and lifechanging and amazing all the time and that we need to have patron gods and Very Close Relationships with Them in order to be Proper Pagans because…well, that’s what gets talked about. We don’t talk about the mundane shit because it’s so mundane. We talk about the big amazing stuff because it feels like if you’re going to talk about anything on the web it should be something of IMPORT.

I haven’t blogged here because for a while I haven’t really felt able to do religion, you know? I felt like there was nothing for me to really say, and I wanted each post here to be important in some way. (Feeling like I can’t do religion is related to the fact that our landlords, who live above us, are pretty super Christian and I feel really weird about doing anything religious in this house.)

So, here’s the mundane shit. The mundane shit that actually has everything to do with my religion, even if it looks or feels like it doesn’t. And some shit that definitely does have to do with my religion but felt so small I didn’t think it warranted a post.

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When Words Aren’t Enough

tcblogprojectgreenSo much of religion or faith is ineffable, or experiential, that when people ask me to explain something, or when I feel like I want to write a post about something, my explanation just turns into a lot of vague hand-waving and sentences peppered with “um” and “you know.”

Well, no, obviously they don’t know or they wouldn’t have asked for an explanation.

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30 Days of Paganism: Beliefs – Magic, spellcraft, mysticism etc

Ok, it feels a bit weird for me to be tackling this right now. I haven’t done much magic lately, but I always seem to be steeped in mysticism so maybe it’ll work out.

So. Magic and spellcraft. To me the practice of magic is entirely mundane. I mean, I’m doing the same stuff I do in the mundane world, I just stepped into a different room to do it. Things like visualization and raising energy help if I’m constructing my own spells, but when dealing with something like folk magic it’s not really necessary. Folk magic is like a recipe. I’m just cooking.

Sometimes I make my own recipe and I find too much energy work isn’t necessary there, either. If I’m creating amulets or talismans or wards I can leave them on my altar to charge, and that’s enough. There’s power in the altar, because it’s where I do things. It’s a power gained repetitively, mundanely. I don’t sit there and concentrate on charging my altar; it just accumulates naturally.

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Embodiment while broken

I never really noticed how much of my religion is physical until I couldn’t do it anymore.

I broke my leg and possibly did some tendon/ligament damage in the knee — unknown at this point — over a week ago. On July 4th, ironically — there is no freedom in this situation. There’s a whole huge story about it, but that’s not the point here. The point is, I broke my leg, and now what I am able to do, relatively speaking, is nothing.

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STOP THROWING AROUND THE WORD ‘PSYCHOPATH’ LIKE IT’S A CUTE NEW TREND

General trigger/content warning for this post. 

Also: several gifs used. 

I just read a post that called the Morrigan a psychopath.

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