over 10 years of posts from Morag Spinner
In the past week I’ve started thinking about gardening as a metaphor for my own healing from my trauma, which has helped me organize my thoughts about it and figure out what steps I need to take next. Imagine the soul, or the mind, or whatever the essence of the person is, as a garden. …
Continue reading “Gardening As a Metaphor for Healing from Trauma”
This post originally appeared on Patreon on Saturday, February 9th, 2019. This morning I channeled my bio-sire in my kitchen. Clothed in woolen socks, boxers, and a sweatshirt, I cooked pancakes on the stove and burned them black. (Well, ok, dark brown. I lack a proper griddle.) This was the way he always did them …
I don’t know. There was a big post I wanted to do about my Oma and my mom and my aunt and how suicide/suicidal ideation/suicide attempts runs in our family, at least on the female/FAAB side, and how Oma would have appreciated that her birthday is also World Suicide Prevention Day, and how Mom and …
My relationship with the Otherfaith and the gods of that faith is still new, budding. I’ve been doing a lot of reading, as much as I can, and trying to understand things. It’s slow going, mostly because I am very tired these days and the day job has sucked away most of my time and …
Continue reading “30 Days of Paganism: Pantheon — Otherfaith”
I wrote this on the 18th of March. I am no longer in the midst of my depressive episode, but I am not fully out of it. Everything I wrote then in this piece is still true, if slightly out of sync with real time.
Part of our TCBP topic for February is Self-Love, so I’m attempting to write about it. It’s hard. I’m finding it as hard as loving myself, honestly, and I find that really freaking difficult. I’ve spent most of my life feeling like an unlovable monster — unworthy, unfuckable, ugly, stupid, wrong, dangerous to those around …
The concept of the wounded healer is a really helpful one for me. I am a fucking mess. I have mental breakdowns on a weekly basis; I often forget to take my meds several days in a row; I basically can’t handle normal human interaction like telephone calls or just, you know, having people see …
Why? Of course because He is beloved to me; of course that. Of course because I am one of His worshippers. Probably I need no other reason. Why? But there are other reasons. Always other reasons; not that I should have to explain myself why I wish to align myself with women who rip men …
This is an article I wrote for Immanence Magazine earlier this year, though I don’t know if it made it in or if the magazine even came out in the past few months. I’ve decided to use it as my Kore post for the Pagan Blog Project. It’s written for a non-pagan, lay-audience, as an …
Continue reading “Kore: Accepting the Past, Preparing for the Future”
It took me a year, but I finally followed through on scrubbing the poison from my bones. It happened at Greaters, which I can’t tell you the details of, but I can tell you my experience. I sobbed in the arms of a god who was Two, and I was scrubbed clean; allowed to let …